Even Free

Even Free
(26 July (words) - 11 November (music) 2000) © 2000 by Kristi Martel

They look at me. They say gorgeous. They say pretty eyes. They say beautiful.

So why
does my head shout ugly shout too fat
shout to weak
shout to thin?

She is only 8
but she wishes her nappy head away
and praises her red-haired doll she says look like me.

I try to tell her how I see
her nappy hair braided and twisted
and free. I love it even free, even free.

I teach brown children.
I teach yellow and white and I teach red. I teach beauty.
I teach love.
But they call it piano.

They look at me. They say gorgeous. They say brave.

They say sing.

So why
does my head shout ugly shout you can't
shout too fat
shout too old?

I tell them they can sing too.
I tell them thank you.
And keep wishing my heart would hear the praise.

The parents of my children,
the moms, their heads shout too fat shout too old.

They meet to encourage each other
to deny themselves
to starve themselves
to pretend something outside of themselves is a better home.

And I
just keep trying to teach love.

Love your body; love your self.
Love your body like no one else does. It is your only home.

And if you don't feel at home there,
then where?
Your body is beautiful even free, even free.